The Mirror Blue Night
by Sabrina Empress of Insanity
Summary: Post series: what if always isn't what you remember? A snapshot of Pike and Lilie's friendship, life, and memories after the fairy tale ends.


_Author's Note: This was actually a gift written for a Princess Tutu-themed Secret Santa gift exchange. I wrote two other fanfics for the same person as well for the exchange, and hopefully my giftee enjoys it!_

**The Mirror Blue Night**

There is no question in either of their minds that they'll be the best of friends, just like they've always been, just like they'll always be. But then every so often there's that odd little skip in their record, that moment that makes them wonder, that strange moment where suddenly they can't remember who they are or what they are to each other because maybe it _wasn't_ always like that.

Except that's just silly. Pike brushes it off easily when it happens and promptly forgets about it, at least at first. And Lilie lets it go easily like she always does whenever anything happens that isn't exactly what she wants right away, or she does the first few times it happens. And it's so rare that they don't even notice except when it happens. But of course then it's like their entire friendship is false and their memories are lies and those moments that suddenly seem to be legion and everywhere all of the time are the truth instead of the other way around, the way it's supposed to be.

It starts when Pike gets distracted by one of the boys in the advanced ballet class when she's supposed to be focused on exercises on the barre. Mademoiselle Rosette, with her heavy accent and strict French discipline, immediately snaps at her and demands an explanation. Pike is capable of taking care of herself even though she is embarrassed but before she can even start to fake an excuse, Lilie is interrupting and explaining that Pike is only distracted by the beauty of the form of the girl in front of her and it's only to be expected because that's just Pike for you but she's so cute, can't Mme. Rosette forgive her?

And Pike turns to stare at Lilie in shock and her friend's clear green eyes are dark with momentary confusion at her impulsive actions and Pike can't help but think that Lilie was treating her just like someone else entirely. And that thought makes her head spin and ache and Mme. Rosette breaks in to tell them both that they are to see her after class to receive their punishments for lying and daydreaming during class so that both girls are brought back to the moment and all of their thoughts are gone in an instant as the moment passes.

Lilie has always had this restless energy about her, a need to be excited about something impossible without any one thing to obsess over ever since Pike met her, and she thinks that it is a good thing that her friend has nothing to latch on to with that energy and focus. She pities any living creature that would have that force thrust upon them. She thinks that Lilie could easily be an addict to whatever she focused all of her energy on, but as it is she is merely a little bit strange and overly exuberant but otherwise a well-adjusted and friendly girl that Pike adores and can't understand why others don't like her as much as she does.

Pike has always been obsessed with boys in all of the years that Lilie has known her, just never any one boy in specific. She gossips about their classmates and upperclassmen and their hobbies and romantic lives and when they look the best in the school performances but as long as they are good looking and enigmatic she is not particular about which one she likes the best. Lilie thinks it's adorable and endearing and is secretly glad that her friend doesn't have any one boy that she really wants because she can be a bit stalkerish as it is and if she really wanted someone wouldn't it be just so easy to manipulate her and hurt her over him? Besides, Lilie hasn't had any experience with obsession or love herself, there just isn't anyone she would want to comfort when they needed it and still find adorable, but she instinctively knows it can be a bad thing. And there just isn't anyone at their school mysterious and handsome enough to be good enough for Pike. Lilie is possessive about her in a way she isn't with anyone else.

A new student transfers to the school the next year, an older boy with thick black hair, arched brows, a solemn look about his face, and an aura of mystery about him. Lilie immediately asks Pike what she thinks of him, smiling all the time, and Pike nods thoughtfully and answers that he's handsome enough and an amazing dancer, but he's nothing compared to…

And confusion momentarily crosses her face and they both fall silent and don't even see when the new student finishes his audition dance. In the background they hear when he is placed in the advanced class in the top male spot even though none of the girls in the advanced class have stood out enough this past year to be the full time prima ballerina, and when Lilie asks under her breath that it's awfully strange that there isn't a prima ballerina in the advance class after so long the moment only gets stranger because why does it matter, why would they think of that instead of about the new student, why did Pike start to compare him to someone that neither of them can even think of, and why does it hurt so much when they look at each other, just the two of them like that, as if they are all alone?

By the end of the year one of the girls has emerged as the clear best in the school and it all is moot once again.

Pike remembers that she wanted to be prima ballerina when she first started dancing, not because of the dances or the prestige or even the costumes but because of the romance in the stories. Now she still wants to become a better dancer, but as far as boys are concerned it's much nicer to be in the background where she can watch and enjoy as she pleases. It's too bad, she always thinks, that there are so many to choose from.

Lilie never wanted to be a prima ballerina. She loves dancing but she likes learning it more than performing, and she likes encouraging others more than either. She advances as time passes of course because that is what happens when you learn but she is content to be average or even a little bit below average so that she can encourage her classmates in their pursuits when they lose hope. A part of her wishes for them to fail so that she can build them up again, but it never really happens and so she sometimes forgets that is the real reason she likes to stay with the lower level students. Since encouraging them to do better usually gets results, she just assumes that it is because she loves being able to help them achieve the impossible.

Both girls started at the school at the same time, the beginning of the same year in the same level. They are on the outskirts of the social crowd even today but back then they had nothing more in common than that and their friendly natures. Sometimes Pike and Lilie both wonder how they became friends but since they are friends and still are now, they don't question that fact and are simply grateful for it. Besides, they have plenty in common now.

What do they have in common? That question is better left unasked because it brings about those moments, and as they grow older it becomes more and more upsetting for it to happen. As time goes by, it is harder and harder to deal with feeling like most of their lives never even happened, not the way that they remember.

Better not to ask at all. Better not to question reality because of a delusional fantasy that neither of them wants to admit they sometimes have. Better to ignore the feelings of unease when they pass the duck pond in town or hear a crow's call in the town square or wake at the break of dawn in their dorm room expecting to hear someone running down the hall that they don't remember because they never existed, staring out the window at the blank and answerless blue mirror of the sky before day breaks fully.

There is never any question in their minds that they will always be the best of friends, just like they've always been, just like they'll always be. Except for the big question that they both try to ignore that maybe in a dream or fairy tale thousands of worlds away "always" is not the way that they remember it.


End file.
